The Power of Silence
What is your relationship with silence? The kind of silence where you can hear the rustle of your clothing if you shift in your chair, silence where you can feel the sound of your heart beating in your chest.
Last week the men in our Guiding Light Recovery program went on an overnight silent retreat at The Hermitage, a beautiful facility on 60+ acres of rolling fields and forest in Three Rivers.
Deafening Quiet
36 hours of quiet. 36 hours of just being with yourself. 36 hours of being in nature.
This period of silence can be a powerful and uncomfortable time for men; free of noise and distractions, no music or conversations or TV, you are left entirely with yourself and your thoughts.
Why is the ability to just BE with yourself so important? We use many things to distract us from uncomfortable feelings and thoughts. For those of us in recovery, we have used alcohol and drugs to numb feelings and to escape being present because the present was too painful. To face these feelings in a safe environment with guidance is powerful, and helps men realize they can live life in a different way than they have before.
The Experience
One of our spiritual directors led the retreat at The Hermitage, offering some thought-prompts and hand-outs for guidance in using this time wisely. The men were encouraged to explore topics we’ve been learning about in community addresses and classes: awareness of stories we tell ourselves, automatic thoughts, patterns of how we soothe ourselves, automatic behavior.
It felt great to see many of the men taking advantage of the solitude, nature and quiet to engage in reflection and writing. For those who are willing to engage in this silence, it can be a time where they may see their true selves for the first time and can experience their spirituality in a new way.
Impact
When we returned, several men commented on how they hadn’t experienced anything like that before. One man shared how revealing the time of quiet and silence had been: he hadn’t realized the extent to which he automatically sought out people and things to entertain him and distract him. He gained a new perspective on himself and his personal growth. And that, right there, is why we go on these retreats.