How to Find Common Will-Planning Ground with Your Spouse
What a wonderful miracle marriage is! God brings two different people – with unique personalities, experiences and opinions – and binds them together in a beautiful, holy union.
Of course, unity doesn’t come without its challenges – and this is especially true when creating a will or estate plan.
One person may have strong viewpoints on how their wealth should be transferred, while the other person has significant anxiety. Likewise, couples may have diverging viewpoints on what and how much should be given to their children or what should go to charity.
If will planning is a hot-button conversation for you and your spouse, you’re in good company! Here are four steps to help you move past your differences and toward the completion of an effective estate plan.
- Call it out. This is a difficult topic and likely very emotional. Acknowledge this from the get-go, and commit to listening and honoring one another.
- Put away your boxing gloves. Don’t treat this conversation as a battle that will be won or lost. Come to the conversation prayed up and determined to find common ground.
- Discuss shared values. You have faith and values that have become the bedrock of your marriage and parenthood. Take a step back from the expected distribution plan. What do you really want to accomplish and model to your loved ones through your plan?
- Identify areas of difference or concern. Where do you see things differently? More importantly, why? Listen carefully to one another with the intent to understand.
- Explore creative solutions. Look for the planning solutions that support your shared values and help you achieve your ultimate goals.
Many couples enlist the help of a trusted planner to guide them through these difficult conversations. Experienced planners have waded in these deep waters many times before, and they can help you identify creative solutions to move forward.
Through Guiding Light’s partnership with Barnabas Foundation, you have direct access to this kind of trusted planning support. At no cost to you, you can speak with someone who not only understands the tax-wise options available, but who also approaches planning from a values-driven, God-honoring perspective.
To learn more and to schedule your complimentary and confidential planning conversation, email Starla McDermott at Starla@GuidingLightWorks.org or call 616-451-0236 x20.
